1) You can be your true self around him (and vice versa)
The early stages of dating can feel a bit like a job interview.
It’s not that we’re faking, it’s more that we’re more way of how we come across.
We want to impress, so we’re usually on our best behavior.
Understandably that can mean accentuating our assets and glossing over anything we think of as less desirable.
But the closer you get, these walls start to come down.
We’re less focused on dazzling one another and can be more sincere around each other.
Licensed clinical social worker, Darcy Sterling, PhD, says genuine love happens when two individuals authentically come together and create a deep level of safety for one another.
“Imagine a Venn diagram that shows two people — each allowed to be their own unique person — and the overlap, which represents the relationship space, is also a place of comfort and acceptance.”
So in many ways, you may not know whether a man genuinely loves you until he has met your demons, as we’re about to see.
2) He accepts your flaws
None of us are perfect, and any relationship if it’s going to last has to accept that.
The extent to which a man can cut you some slack around your flaws is often directly proportionate to the strength of his feelings for you.
He knows your weaknesses as well as your strengths.
If he can look past the little things and focus on what makes you awesome, it’s a sign of genuine love.
3) He open and available with you
He shares parts of himself with you that not everyone sees. That shows he is prepared to be vulnerable.
It’s an essential part of being emotionally available. And that’s often a huge decider in whether you’re dealing with lust or love.
Research has highlighted how important relationship readiness is to whether things work out.
Until a man is prepared to expose himself to genuine love, feelings cannot deepen.
Licensed therapist Ken Page says although attraction is important, so too is availability.
“A mixture of true vulnerability, desire, sexuality, and romance that creates a blend—kind of like the Holy Grail—of safety, excitement, availability, and shared love. That’s really what we’re looking for.
Signs of this emotional availability include open and honest communication. He is transparent about his feelings and thoughts. Not just the positive ones either.
He is also willing to have difficult conversations with you too. Because as we’re about to see, real love isn’t always plain sailing.
4) He sticks around through the hard times
It’s not that genuine love isn’t filled with lots of fun, laughter, and good times. Of course, it can be sexy, light, exciting and passionate.
But so too can lust.
That’s why many of our signs he genuinely loves you are about his willingness to be around for the less glamorous aspects that come along with a real relationship.
According to research, as many as two-thirds of our relationship problems aren’t solvable.
Genuine love doesn’t do a runner during these times.
A guy who loves you knows that issues arise, arguments are inevitable, and he wants to move past them
5) He sacrifices for you
A guy who is genuinely in love isn’t just concerned with getting his needs and wants met.
That means, he isn’t selfish and is prepared to put you first.
So you’ll notice that he goes out of his way to make you happy. He puts your needs above his own sometimes.
He values quality time spent together, makes plans, and prioritizes your relationship over other things in his life.
6) He’s respectful
Respect is fundamental when it comes to all quality relationships, romantic ones included.
So say countless studies which highlight how important it is in cultivating commitment intimacy, attachment, and satisfaction.
It led one group of researchers to conclude that:
“Respect thus appears to be an important part of the intrinsic meaning of a close, romantic relationship.”
So what does respect in a relationship actually look like?
● He shows appreciation
● He honors your boundaries
● He expresses his love for you through words and actions
● He values your opinions, thoughts, and feelings
● He recognizes your independence and autonomy
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